I don't think I'll ever lose the Flame of Rebellion, because I believe that if you're happy with the way our current society is, you either have low standards--This is an age where stuff like this STILL HAPPENS--Or just don't really think too hard about everything in society that just doesn't make sense.

On another thread of living a Designed Life, I started pondering if my life was designed and realized something: The world is really cruel if you don't fit in or cater to the demands of it.

As a young kid I once had very long hair. Hair longer than most girls. I personally liked having long hair and didn't see the big deal over it. I thought I looked neat with it. However, everyone else seemed to disagree. I was called a faggot, a girl. I was alienated from all of my former friends and harrassed and bullied constantly, by boys and girls. Someone even tried to set it on fire in a Chemistry class once. And the adults weren't very kind either; Various adults either assumed something was wrong with me because I had long hair or did the typical adult passive-aggressive suggestion that I should cut it without saying I should cut it.

I know rebellious teens are annoying, but I just had long hair. I didn't even bother anyone else or get into trouble. At least not initially; Turns out when you're alienated and alone, you tend to find some group that will accept you, and the only group that moderately accepted me was a kind of outcast group; Kids who went to 4chan and laughed at the gore and casual bullying that was rampant in those "golden years" of /b/. I hated them, but couldn't hate them too much, because hanging out with them made me realize that despite being a group of assholes, they were pretty much no different from the other group of assholes, and they talked to me to boot. Not only that, I took a little piece them with me along the way. You can't help it, really.

I went from living a relatively calm and normal life as a somewhat average kid into being directed straight into the other status, and boy were my eyes open and mouth firmly shut.

I don't think I'll ever lose the flames of rebellion, because the flame of rebellion came to me and left its burn forever with me. I didn't want to be outside the status quo, but it happened, and I guess I'm better off for it. I know how it feels to be severely alienated, and have taken a bit of a complex about it, defending people who are often attacked.

It's funny how something seemingly innocuous can drastically alter your life. I often wonder how my life would be if I decided to stick "on-track" as my guidance counselor told me I was supposed to be. My entire life from middle-school to this day has been quite off the tracks of a normal life. I probably wouldn't be here typing this and pondering about this. Such is life.