Just for you. Although, to be clear - that isn't me responding to incompetence. That's me responding to brashness, an argument I disagree with, slander, and a difference of opinion (in that order).

I think we might disagree as to what "incompetent" means. To me, it means someone who not only lacks the skills to deal with the task or challenge they're presented with, they fundamentally lack the ability to gain those skills. Ignorance is acute. Incompetence is chronic.

Either way, the fact that you have to "deal with" incompetence implies that it's flowing through you in some way. We'll also assume that it's incompetence that you can't dismiss, that you can't wall off, that you can't pass merrily along to someone else.

Believe it or not, I start with empathy.

I've got a buddy. He's been doing my job for a lot longer than I have. And he's easily distracted, and he's often frustrated, and he doesn't sleep so well. He's ragged edge of flaming out most of the time. But he's got a heart of gold. It's like hanging out with Winnie the Pooh. He means absolutely nobody any harm and he's got a family of five to feed. And there are jobs that he's working - that other people are more qualified to work - because we just can't bear to see him crash and burn.

I wouldn't call him incompetent, but there are days when his behavior is indistinguishable from incompetence. And the best thing is to double-check his work on the sly, and make sure that he's got all the information he needs, and check up on him, because in most jobs 90% of it can be done by an absolute idiot so you hope that today isn't a ten percent day (or if it is, he rises to the challenge). And fortunately for him, he's an easy guy to empathize with - so even when the clients see that he didn't exactly bring his (non-existent) A-game, it all sort of works out.

The "incompetent boss" problem I'm a little mellower than you. I think you'll find that you're not the only person who knows they're incompetent. You might be surprised to know that they know they're incompetent, too. Your job, from their perspective, is to enable their incompetence. The good bosses, were you to scream "YOU'RE A FUCKING IDIOT!" at them, would scream back "I KNOW! FIX IT!" It's actually not a bad place to be. Pretty much anything you can do to staunch the bleeding is an improvement; an incompetent boss with self-awareness lowers the bar in a maddening but manageable way.

An incompetent boss without self-awareness: now that's a danger sign. You are going to be blamed for shit that you will have zero control over. You will be judged on parameters utterly beyond your ken. And you will be held to an arbitrary standard that may not even apply to your local space-time continuum. Those bosses you want to get out from under, as quickly as possible, making as few waves as possible. If done correctly, they won't even remember your name.

That's one of the advantages of freelancing - you get through the gig and you swear never again.

PS. You have a choice: (A) smoke (B) live in Southern California. You can't do both or you'll look like an alligator handbag in glasses before you're 35. At least switch to e-cigs. They have cool LEDs and shit.