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I cannot speak for the second child since I only have one at the moment. I reserve the right to get back to you on how I feel when the second one comes along. :)
For me personally, the first time I held my son, he was the very center of my universe and remains so still. Is he more important than my spouse? I would have to say yes. If I were to ask my wife if our son is more important to her than I, I am certain she would say yes also. It is not because we don't love each other. Far from it, it simply means that we love our son more. I recall the sleep deprivation, the piss in the face, and the runny stool on me all too well. As I am sure you will agree, it was all worth it and them some.