That was going on 20 years and I have yet to see a discussion of "white privilege" not used as some form of "I don't have to listen to what you're saying, you're white." Which, let's be honest, changes nothing. I'm never going to stop being white. I'm never going to stop having white privilege. But every time someone decides that not only are my thoughts and opinions irrelevant because of it but that I somehow haven't been responsible for the things that are right in my life, I care a little less about people without white privilege.

That's weird because I've had the exact opposite experience, where I've never seen it used as a way to shut someone up or tell them that they shouldn't have an opinion. I've seen white people who have had their white privilege pointed out claim that the descriptor was used to tell them to shut up but usually when I read the discussion it becomes clear that it wasn't the case.

The problem is that the term is usually used in the sense of "check your privilege" (not always using those words but the meaning is the same) and people on the defensive tend to interpret this as a: "Shut up, you're not welcome to speak on this topic". When in reality CYP is pretty much only used to say that the person is missing vital data that can inform their position and only if they took the time to learn and listen about what they're missing then they'd have a fuller basis to work their opinion from. If anything, it's an invitation to talk on the topic, once they understand enough about the topic to talk meaningfully about it.

I don't doubt that there are people who have used it in the way you say but in my experience it's far from the majority. Usually the term is used in the scientific sense and is just describing a very specific phenomenon. I've always wondered why privileged people got so defensive over the concept of privilege and originally I thought it was the terminology, but if you use "advantage" and "disadvantage" you get the same problems (just see some of the comments in this thread).

Now I tend to think that the problem is that being privileged means that they are often sheltered from ever being lumped within a specific group, especially one that has negative traits associated with it and is so fundamental to their person, so when they hear "white privilege" they think, "Fuck that, I'm an individual, you can't lump me in with all other white people". For most minorities being seen as a "representative" of your group is a daily experience so they can't see why privileged people would be so hostile to it, unless they were actively bigoted. So we end up with a bit of a mess where people are defensive, upset and angry, and arguing over semantics rather than accepting the privilege they have and working to improve society.