Your words got me thinking a lot because you hit the source of the problem spot-on.

Are you looking for flaws and reasons not to get close to people ? Maybe part of you is ready to start making friends but that other part is seeking out reasons not to.

This is precisely what it is. Ever since I've thought this through, I had a fun time with people whom I'd usually criticize internally, and it's been a huge difference. Why I criticize them? Because deep down, I'm angry at how imperfect they are; at how imperfect the world is.

Those children who grow up to be well-adjusted, healthy and kind adults go through what's called "ego breaking" early on in their lives. It's the process of adjusting the child's expectations of the world by breaking the innate idea that things in their lives have to be perfect or may not exist at all. It's not a violent process but a necessary step in one's mental development; it's why children throw tantrums when they're very young: they're expressing their anger over the imperfection of the world due to them being unallowed something (because this is what anger is - our reaction to an element of our world seeming unfit for what it ideally should be).

I didn't go through that, instead being pampered by my parents, and I'm going through it now; though now that my idea of self is far more solid, its breaking is a more tedious and slow process than what children have. I'm telling you this because I've always been seeking improvement through understanding; if your friend is of the same mode of world-learning, they'll find this idea helpful because it gives them a reason, a ground to work on.

Thank you for sharing and for inspiring me to think along those lines. It's been very helpful, as it pushes my social process forward tremendously.