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I don't really get the sad pessimistic spin people such as the author put on the idea that we have to realize our partner has problems and will piss us off. Maybe it's because I never bought in to the whole "Mr./Mrs. Right" romantic mumbo jumbo bit but that just seem incredibly obvious. I know my BF's issues and he knows mine because we are here to help each other grow. I know that if we have kids he will be able to excel in ways that I can't and they'll get more out of it that way. That is stuff to get excited about, not pessimistic. Personal growth is always exciting and getting to share that journey is great. It also doesn't hurt that he cleans a lot.