by lil

Now you say you're lonely

You cried the whole night through.

Well you can cry me a river, cry me a river

I cried a river over you.

I didn't exactly cry a river. I just decided that I would win this -- and winning meant staying fabulous. But I was very angry and had some difficult months and will likely have more.

On Monday night and again tonight, the ex-spousal-unit phones me. I stupidly answer. So now the love interest that he dumped me for told him (yet again) that she wants to marry someone BUT NOT HIM. Not now, not ever. He's just

not the guy.

So he's broken-hearted and suddenly realizes what a shit he's been. He doesn't seem to have many friends, he's lonely, and feels guilty -- not so much for dumping me, but for how he did it: by turning into a block of ice. . . . now melting as he cries to me on the phone.

He's seeing a therapist -- the one we briefly saw between his July 1 declaration, I want space and July 30, I'm done. He wants to find out what happened. He suggests that maybe I go with him to one of his appointments. We could "pick up the discussion where we left it in July," he says. In July, the therapist said she would not work with us unless we were both committed to working on the relationship. He wasn't.

I say, "What part of after the lawyers don't you understand?"

I don't actually say that. I'm not that mean. I say almost nothing. I don't want to be in the conversation.

Cry me a river. Cry me a river. I cried a river over you.

What can be learned?

(I don't tell him that I met a prince, but if he bothered to follow me on hubski, he would know.)

(OK, my new guy might not be a prince, but his kiss sure woke me up!)