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AnSionnachRua  ·  4388 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: My Ex-Gay Friend

Oh, I'll agree with you there. I'd never insist on essential definitions of sexuality (indeed, I'm aware that the notion of categorisation based on sexual identity is a historically recent construction).

I'm just caught on your mention of "individual definitions". If I define "gay" as attraction to the same sex - let's just say a woman attracted to a woman (avoiding for now the debate re: gender and sex) - and you don't think it is necessarily defined by attraction to the same sex, then you and I will not understand each other. You will say that you are gay in conditions in which I will deny your gayness.

My point is just that there is an inherent problem in asserting that you are gay if there is no criterion at all for gayness.