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_refugee_  ·  4146 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: AskHubski: Do you feel as though you contribute to society?

Funny thing, I was raised by a mother who told all my relatives not to compliment me on my appearance because she didn't want me to value looks.

This is not the way to go. (I think you mixing it up is a better/the best approach.) Unfortunately when you tell someone not to comment on looks, this usually twists into "don't compliment them on their looks, but you can call them out if you think they are scruffy/overweight/unkempt etc." Hello, complexes...

;) All better now, no worries.