I don't think having rules is going to make a difference. People just need to suck less. Reddit has rules, and subreddits usually have their own rules, but you still get tons of jerks. People are absorbed in their own little worlds, especially the hateful ones. They forget they're interacting with other humans. Anyone who's ever worked retail knows what it feels like to have a customer just walk up yacking on their cell phone and not say hello as if you're just some machine, or in fast food, customers are notably more nastier in drive thru vs ones that come inside to order (because they don't see your face at first.) Also it's why they say when you're lying on the ground hurt/dying, that you should call out to someone specifically, and look them in eye and ask for help, because people are just so absorbed in themselves and assume someone else will help. On YouTube, etc. you just see an extreme version of this self centeredness because they have total anonymity and they can just go on and say awful things with no real repercussion.
I think the causes of the Bystander Effect are way more complicated than you are representing here. It would be fallacious to claim that it results solely from people being self-absorbed.Also it's why they say when you're lying on the ground hurt/dying, that you should call out to someone specifically, and look them in eye and ask for help, because people are just so absorbed in themselves and assume someone else will help.
A 2009 study published by International Ombudsman Association in the Journal of the International Ombudsman Association suggests that—in reality—there are dozens of reasons why people do not act on the spot or come forward in the workplace when they see behavior they consider unacceptable.