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I never use the words "retarded" or "gay," but my friends and I throw around the word "fag" a lot. I suppose I think of it as harmless, seeing that I've been in a homosexual relationship and honestly don't give a flying fuck. I don't care if my friend calls me a faggot. I don't care if a stranger calls me a faggot. If I'm acting faggoty, then call me a faggot. This of course transcends the main definition of the word in our culture. It has been redefined (at least around where I live) to mean something along the lines of "douchebag." Using the word as such is mostly non-offensive. If you're using the word "fag" to negatively compare someone to a homosexual, that's not okay.