This is a story about John, Mary, Cumol and Boss. John is working on his Ph. D and is not a good scientist. Boss knows he is not a good scientist. Mary is working on her Ph. D and is not a good scientist. Boss either knows she isn't a good scientist or is too incompetent to figure it out. Cumol is working on his Ph. D and sounds like a good scientist (hard for the audience to know for sure, but it seems reasonable). Boss has no reason to think Cumol isn't a good scientist, other than Mary attempting to share her incompetence with Cumol. Boss is an asshole. There are four people in this story, and one of them doesn't belong. Of these four people, one of them employs the other three. All three employees are there because they don't have any better options right now, but only Cumol has the luxury of supposing better options will come around eventually. Mary and John? Yeah, they're stuck where they are because they suck at what they do. There are four people in this story, and one of them doesn't belong. Of these four people, one of them doesn't suck. The three that suck all sort of want Cumol to go away because - honestly, dude - you make them all look bad. So when Mary and John tell you their lives would be better if you left, they're not wrong. They're assholes, but correct assholes. The fact of the matter is you'd bolt to a better job instantaneously if one presented itself, and the fact of the matter is they're assholes and not at all concerned about your well-being. The happy solution for everyone is for you to be somewhere else. However, their happiness doesn't hinge on your happiness so the sooner they can kick you out the door the faster they can return to comfy mediocrity. After all, they have to have some sense that you don't think they're competent; they might even have the creeping suspicion that you're right. These people exist all over the world. I've worked with lots of them. You are correct: You should never have trusted your colleagues. Now is about the time to start thinking "what the fuck am I doing here?" and burning the midnight oil to end up somewhere else. It's abundantly clear you are not employed by a meritocracy which means you are there as long as it's more convenient to employ you than let you go. The more you draw attention to everyone else's mediocrity the less that situation balances in your favor. Shitty situation, and I'm sorry. But you're basically saying "I hate my job and am surrounded by backstabbing, incompetent opportunists, what do I do?" And you're a clever guy. You can solve that by inspection. There's a hell of a lot of road between theory and practice, I know. If I had any way to help in that department I'd be all over it. Know that we're all pulling for you, and we tip one back in your general direction.
this looks much clearer than the stuff I wrote :D The only reason I am staying is because it's easy money. I am getting paid for what I am good at. And the moment I actually find the project interesting, things go to shit. Edit: the only thing I need to figure out is how I want to communicate that I am leaving. Do I go the honest way, basically telling the boss its mainly because of him that I am leaving? Or do I do it the clever way, tell him its about the university and that the project doesn't work for me? The first option will make me feel good, but might have a bad influence on my later career... The second option is only partly true.
Advice No 2: Never, ever, tell anyone at your job that you are trying to leave/going to leave. A person who is known to be trying to leave will be pushed under the bus by absolutely everyone else who doesn't want to leave but knows someone needs to. If either of these people told your boss you were trying to leave, you'd become the first person fired when the boss was told the department was over budget (or layoffs needed to happen, or etc. etc.). These people clearly don't have your best interests in mind (and most of your coworkers won't, ever) so I frankly don't see what has stopped them from telling him already. I would consider this a very unstable situation at this point.
Yeah, its a ticking bomb, I learned my lesson. The next due date is the 8th of February. On that day, the boss will tell John whether he is staying or not and what project he is getting. Just need to figure out what to tell the boss. He will want to know why I don't want to do my PhD in his lab...