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comment by TheGreatAbider16

Congrats! I loved:

  "Sometimes this is it like fishes,
   Still and often"
I really like the elusive descriptions, like I can almost imagine what "it" is/was, but not quite.




_refugee_  ·  3566 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Thanks! Also I'd love to hear what you think "it" is. I am pretty sure everyone is going to have a different feeling or interpretation (which is great) and I'd love to hear all of them.

TheGreatAbider16  ·  3566 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Well all I worked out with certainty is that "it" is not something tangible. The lines "It was less a nerve and no

  part skin, a piece twinging,
  tingled at the bit. It was electric.
  In the night it hummed against the skyline"
as well as

  Handed off, returns determined 
made me think of a physical sensation. It made me think of being high, to be honest, especially the buzzing against the skyline. Probably just a lot of reader response involved there, and for a moment I thought maybe you were describing a high and a relationship with a drug. But I decided there wasn't enough evidence for that, and switched to thinking you were describing a feeling.

The natural world imagery with the bees and in

  Sometimes this is it like fishes,
  still and often,
made me think of meditation, mindfulness, almost a transcendental perspective. So then I thought maybe you were describing a lighting bolt-like feeling of oneness with the universe that struck you "still and often," but was elusive and hard to recreate on command, like slippery, beautiful fishes. Having read your breakdown in response to lil, I now see that I was way off the mark, and missing necessary contextual info to make sense of the fishes. Anyway I never reached a conclusion, but I liked the feelings it created. I'm a big fan of reader response-heavy interpretation, so I really liked the images and memories that it pulled from my mind.