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I agree wholeheartedly that dressing well and speaking properly are not the domain of the white man. On reread, I should have put "look white" in quotes. I was trying to be careful, because I have heard from several black and women activists that what we, as white men, expect from others is to conform to our world. For example, in order for a woman to be taken seriously at a job, we expect that she have male-associated traits, such as being unemotional, hyper rational and dominant. This is not my idea, and I don't agree with it. I was trying to anticipate someone hitting me with the "white man's world" argument, and I didn't succeed. See what poor language can do?!