LOL we've been catching up with each other the entire time you've been gone! You go first! ;-) Welcome back!
I have no idea were to start. 2 years is a long time when you are 20. But eh, yesterday I openly challenged the unofficial leader of the local county wing of my party. Well, my previous party. I did say that I would leave if the members approved the suggestion that he get a mandate to completely on his own negotiate with the other parties. 6-4 was the result. And that isn't bad for a first try. It was very clear it was him or me, and that it was almost even is something I am very proud of. I argued my position for one and a half hour. With no support. I didn't win. But I did try. And I was extremely cool. Doing this kind of thing is literally a childhood dream of mine. And the local wing of the party that is next most ideologically similar to mine has accepted me with open arms. Especially as I say that I am a very ideological person. So doing something even cooler than I thought possible at 14 is a very, very nice feeling.
I have learned firsthand how the human brain handles traumatic memories. I have gotten better at handling failure. I have realized things about myself, I have gotten a better idea of who I am. I have learned first hand that life is easier when your brain is functioning. I have met some really interesting people, I have met people who have only known me as an adult. I have changed my plans for life multiple times, I have had a relationship and realized that I most definitely do not like guys. I have gotten better at forgiving myself. I have a much better life than I did 2 years ago.
If you want to understand how are brains work try the book "Righteous Minds". We all react emotionally first then use our intellect (rational side of our brain) to rationalize our response. With time we can alter our emotional response, or manage it first, but it takes understanding how we function to do it well. We also build stories to explain our world, and like all stories/myths, our stories are often inaccurate and always incomplete. I realize this is an attempt to condense an entire book, actually several books, into a paragraph so it is not a very good story I am presenting to you.
I was just listening to a Podcast and Haidt was on it, crazy how that works. Will need to find that book.
It was a very interesting synopsis, so you presented it well.