Here's a question, and an honest one (I'm not trying to make fun, I'm just genuinely curious, since I didn't have that hyper-religious experience as a kid). When you come from a background where the Word is all, then you discover that there is so much more to life, do you kind of feel like your whole life has been a lie? Or like you've not really been living in the world, to some extent? It seems a bit like a very grand Santa Clause to me, but Santa is the only qualitatively similar thing I can think of fro my life. Did you have an 'ah ha!' moment, or did you gradually move away from your upbringing?
Yes definitely. The realization that the way things operate are drastically different than the way I was taught was jarring. It's difficult in some situations, for example I went to a private university that was expensive, didn't provide an in depth education, and completely ignored some facts such as the age of the earth and evolution. My disbelief probably started as being disgruntled from going to church every weekend and other church functions. I just got tired of it, and the fact that I had depression and no one seemed to care didn't help that fact. I came to these realizations about the same time I moved out on my own, so I was suddenly in this "real world" that I had been sheltered from for so long. This sort of started the "ah ha!" moment for me, but it was more of a "don't care anymore" attitude. Then after I started reading about the science behind the things I didn't know, it truly became the 'ah ha!' moment as I realized I was definitely atheist after understanding more than I ever had about basic science. It's not like I didn't learn chemistry, I was simply never taught evolution. Those things were always scoffed at. It hurts my parents I know, and I haven't told them I'm an atheist so that's fun. They know I don't believe everything they believe, but my mother feels like I won't go to heaven since I have decided to "reject the truth". It's difficult because I know they love me, but at the same time I feel like I was somewhat brainwashed and abused by religion. But so were they...