I think there is something to be said in the fact that we can all learn by taking the time to eventually respond to things that we might not agree with. I know that's something that has gotten me in trouble in the past in real, reacting too quickly to respond to things without taking the time to remove negativity or other emotions and be constructive in a conversation. I completely agree with this. In this case, a relationship is not a warzone, it is not a buildup of arms to see who can intimidate the other into submission. In that sense, a verbal or really any other interaction with another person doesn't always have to be an argument until one person admits that one they are wrong and the other is right. It can be more constructive to find a point that you agree with and build off of that. Finding that common ground can be a great way to reconsidering your own viewpoints or guiding people towards reconsidering theirs. I might be completely off of the mark of this post with what I just said, but either way I appreciate your post. Edit: Re to flagamuffin: I wouldn't have anybody muted if it wasn't for that SRS brigade and honestly I could unmute them since they're mostly gone at this point, but that's 20 clicks I don't feel like making right now.The reply bothered me though, so I eventually replied.
If I were threatened by a bullethead spouse, I'd sure as hell get out of the situation -- not get myself a gun.
bfx - you get my post 100%. thank you for your comment It can be more constructive to find a point that you agree with and build off of that. Finding that common ground can be a great way to reconsidering your own viewpoints or guiding people towards reconsidering theirs.
That's what I'm trying to say. We have difficulty doing this when it feels like the other person's words are a personal attack rather than a projection of the other person's beliefs. In the example I give, the person was telling me that I was being a victim, so I felt both attacked and misunderstood, since, in spite of my use of first person, the story was not about me