I'm extremely anti-tipping, but we live in a culture where tipping exists, so we should tip well. However, we should all be working towards pushing legislation that requires the service industry to pay people a liveable wage so tipping isn't necessary.
If I got payed minimum wage I'd take a $10-20 an hour pay cut. This would be a highly desirable outcome for owners of capital and a terrible outcome for workers. My bet is we will see tipping eliminated before we see the minimum wage become a living wage. All you folks who hate tipping can feel great that you won't be trouble over the expectation that you are under a fuzzy sorta obligation to leave a small portion of your meal expense to the person who got it there. Meanwhile the people who work hard to put food in your guts and booze in your veins will no longer be able to do things like maybe buy a house or support a few kids in something other than poverty. I understand that you are for a living wage but the owners of capital call the shot in this society and it rarely works out in favor of the worker.
I have no problem leaving the cash, the problem is forcing service industry employees to have to rely on that to survive and making them slaves to the system. I know because I worked in the system for years and just tried to get back into it, and hated myself for it as well. I would never advocate making those jobs minimum wage, they're clearly 16-20 dollar an hour jobs. Hell, I'd even still leave tips after people are paid well because those employees deserve extra, and I'd feel better about it too because I'd know that if there's a slow day, or week, or month, or year, that employee isn't going to be royally fucked, and my 20% extra doesn't have to be budgeted just so his family can eat. I'm not anti-tipping, I'm anti-tipping reliance.
If I remember right you're a bartender? It's difficult to lump that in with waiting tables, because in my somewhat kneejerk opinion one is skilled labor and one isn't. Under a non-tipping system, I think most places would pay bartenders more than minimum wage. A good, fast, competent bartender keeps people coming back to the same bar or restaurant over a long period of time. Add that to the fact that even if we somehow adopted a non-tipping culture overnight, there are some jobs that I bet would still get "tipped" a bit as a thank you/plea for preferential treatment. (Witness the fact that some people "tip" bartenders in advance at crowded high-end bars ... before they've received any service. To me that kinda undercuts the argument that tipping's vital function is to serve as a carrot on a stick.) I've worked food service but not as a waiter. Seems like all my friends are waiters or bartenders or combination, though. They make good $/hr but don't like their jobs much and have to fight hard to keep their hrs/week at a fiscally stable level. shrug
A good waiter is a highly skilled professional, they are an essential part of any outstanding dining experience. I put a wonderful meal way above a fancy cocktail. I don't really give a damn about adding a complex cocktail to a dining experience, I might have a Side Car or a bourbon at the outset of a big feasts and maybe a nice port to finish but I prefer a crisp clean lager with my food. I size up my waiter first thing, tell them what I've got my eye on and ask them what they suggest. If I like the cut of their jib I pretty much just sort out the few things the suggest that I try. I find that most the great meals I've had were when I've put myself at the wait staff and kitchens mercy. This shit doesn't happen at a TGI Fridays, but the roll of a waiter is different at that kind of joint. A top waiter isn't fighting for shifts, they've generally worked the same schedual with a few changes for years if not decades. This is somewhat outside the scope of your comment but holy hell i love a great professional waiter. Lots of in between in the profession but I've known some waiters who make me come back to the same mom and poo diner week after week. As bartenders go, the quality I admire most in one is efficiency. I mostly drink burbon and a back, I want a bartender who remembers what I order has it in front of me at the top speed. I expect that a bartender should be proficient in all the traditional cocktails and not much more. There are a few places I'll go for exotic drinks but in general most bars would benefit from getting the basics done fast and strong. Every bartender should have a selection of stupid shots cause when I'm on a tear I like it stupid.
I love my bartenders that give me my drink before I even ask - but sometimes I mix it up a bit (usually at brunch) - however they've mostly caught on. If I'm there in the evening I want a double-rum-and-diet (if they are especially attentive they'll remember I sometimes ask for two limes) - maybe I mix it up with a shot - and keep 'em comin. Brunch is different it can be hard to swallow soda that early in the morning. Good waiters do constitute skilled "professionals" or whatever you want to call it. It won't be your waiters at Friendly's though.