_refugee_'s analogy is pretty spot on. I'm not trying to insult you, and I'm not kidding when I say this, I'm trying to help you. It's obvious that you care deeply about this, and there is some truth in what you say and it can be hard for some people to hear. This doesn't mean that you shouldn't be saying it, in fact it probably means the opposite. But it's all in how and when. Try a new approach. There's more than one way to skin a cat. -sorry, I couldn't resist. --what an odd phrase though, does anybody know the origin?
Stackexchange also wonders. Best guess: cat skinning (alive v. dead) was the subject of popular horror in 1832. It was used in Westward Ho! in 1840 for shock value as a consequence, then used by Mark Twain in 1890 as a conscious or unconscious homage/allusion. Connecticut Yankee is very much a downy-homey adventure in Camelot and Twain probably liked the shock comparison. Meanwhile, most readers of Twain didn't know his allusions and references but he was much beloved during his lifetime, so he gave the term legitimacy, much like Li'l Wayne and "no homo." Meanwhile the original meaning was lost. This is how people think "calling a spade a spade" is a racist comment, despite dating back to Plutarch.