-- "Do I make assumptions that my women classmates or team members or co-workers might not be as skilled or might be differently skilled that the males?" Only when I really take a disliking to someone. -- "Do I prefer men in the group to lead the projects?" I refuse to take leadership roles, and think much less of anyone who does. There is something inherently untrustworthy to me about choosing to direct rather than do, and I find it hard to respect anyone who makes a habit of it or takes a position where it's a permanent thing.-- “Am I treating women with the same respect and consideration that I would treat a male team member?”
-- “Am I assuming too many leadership roles without giving others a chance?”
Think of it less as choosing to direct and think more of it as taking on the burden of responsibility. For example, if I were your supervisor and you were part of my team, ultimately the responsibility from the decisions that are made to the results that follow fall on my shoulders. I am there to insulate you not only from the challenge of making the hard decisions, but also any negative fallout that might follow. Conversely, if we succeed, it's not because of anything I did, but what we did together.I refuse to take leadership roles, and think much less of anyone who does. There is something inherently untrustworthy to me about choosing to direct rather than do, and I find it hard to respect anyone who makes a habit of it or takes a position where it's a permanent thing.
I see where you're coming from and to an extent I agree. The thing is though, the responsibility of success for an individual worker falls on that individual. However, the responsibility of success for a team falls on the supervisor. Let's say you and I work in a factory. Let's say you're a new hire and I am a floor supervisor. As a floor supervisor, it's my responsibility to make sure the whole production line moves smoothly. As a new hire, it's your responsibility to assume the role of Workman One. Workman One's role is pretty straight forward. It is your job to put Rod A into Slot B to create Unit 1. It's important that you do such proficiently, so Workman Two can put Unit 1 with Unit 2 to make construct A. You, as Workman One, have three main purposes that can be broken down as such . . . 1) Put Rod A into Slot B as quickly and efficiently as possible without error to produce as many Unit 1s as possible in a given amount of time. 2) Understand the how Rod A and Slot B as individual pieces function, so that you may understand the final purpose of Unit 1. Knowing these, you will know how to best put together a proper and functional final product. 3) Understand Unit 1's relationship with Unit 2. Properly understanding how all of these components work together once again goes towards creating a proper and functional final product. Now, let's say for some reason you have trouble putting Rod A into Slot B. That's okay. You're new. We're in this together. It now falls onto my shoulders that you understand your role on our team so that we can not only create a working product but also save time and minimize waste. There are many ways I can do such a thing and I will employ as many as possible. I will do everything from coaching you on your specific job to make sure you understand your individual role to partnering you with your other team members so you can see how your job and their jobs rely on each other. Let's keep in mind this whole time though that I chose you. I see that there is value in you as an individual that makes me want you on my team. Not only that, but we've already gone through all of the initial training. At this point, you are a vested interest. As a result, your success as an individual on my team is not only your problem, but mine as well. By taking you onto my team, your success as a team member becomes my responsibility. So let's say that you continue to struggle. When my supervisor comes to me at the end of the week to talk about my numbers, he will bring up your area of production. He will say something to the effect of "rd95, why is bfv under performing?" On the surface, it sounds very simple. What it actually is though, is a very chilling statement. What my supervisor is asking is less "Why is your team member falling short" and more "Why, as a supervisor, are you allowing your team member to fall short." You, awesome guy that you are, will be in a little bit of trouble. Me though, as a supervisor, will be in a lot of trouble, because I as an team leader have failed to take initiative to solve a problem that affects my team as a whole. There are a lot of things I, as a supervisor, can do. All of which has positives and negatives behind them. I can keep you in your current role hoping you pick up on it in a week or so, but in the mean time I risk the loss of material. Purchasing hates that. I could have you retrained for a different role, but as a result we're now spending time and resources on a retraining. HR hates that. I could also recommend to my supervisor to have you let go altogether, but despite your failings, everyone on the team adores you, and they'll hate me for that, building friction between me and them as a supervisor. If that seems overwhelming, cause it is, keep in mind that's one tiny facet as a supervisor. We have to maintain everything from scheduling to variable cost control to team moral. Your decisions as an individual affect only you. My decisions as a team leader? They affect everyone. Though I have to say, judging you as an individual, if we ever found ourselves working together, I think I'd bank on you. ;)
Your last comment was interesting to me, although not for the purposes of the original thread. I can understand what you are saying in a more formal setting, but let's say, for example, if there is a school science project or even a group of friends deciding where to go for dinner, and nobody is taking initiative or making any executive decisions. Oftentimes if someone makes a decision, people automatically start taking that person's lead and asking them how they want things to go. Do you object to someone making this type of first move?
With school projects, I always just did them if no one else wanted to. I think taking a task that isn't getting done on yourself is a fine thing to do. I never saw it happen when I was in school, but if hypothetically someone took it upon themselves to make other people do the work rather than doing it themselves, then yes, I would have thought less of them. This has never been my experience. I take offense when people start making decisions for me.Oftentimes if someone makes a decision, people automatically start taking that person's lead and asking them how they want things to go