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comment by user-inactivated
user-inactivated  ·  2948 days ago  ·  link  ·    ·  parent  ·  post: Why You Will Marry The Wrong Person

You know, I didn't feel like what he was referring to was the kind of pessimism we all hear about: the resignation kind, the fatalistic kind. Instead, I hear the notion of letting go of things that don't matter. Something akin to...

Sure, you'll make mistakes. We all will. We don't know what we want, so while hurling yourself blindly to the ever-escaping, vague light that we all strive for, you're certainly going to hurt a limb or two. That's okay. The people you meet aren't going to be perfect, in themselves or for you - and that's okay too. Don't make a fuss out of having a fight or two: it's not the end of the world.

Acceptance, if anything.

Maybe it's just me. I'm a rebellious asshole who, if told that there's nothing better in the world, marches on twice the speed. I've so far assumed that everybody in my kind of situation would develop this kind of resilience towards the ill. Otherwise, there's no living, right?

It's not an inspiring lesson like some others I've heard him pronounce, but are truths supposed to be always inspiring? can they be?

I don't think it hurt me, though. He's not poisoning me, and he's not poisoning you. So who's getting poisoned?





user-inactivated  ·  2947 days ago  ·  link  ·  
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user-inactivated  ·  2946 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Let me first say that I'm not very familiar with his teachings, despite the buzz. I've only personally read the article in question and another one of his that talks about mistakes and clouds. I presume, since you speak with confidence about his teachings, that you are more knowledgable about them than I am.

I've been struggling with the idea that there must be some foundation of things beyond which you mustn't degrade your tastes or desires simply because you can't attain them for as long as I can remember. What I understand by "foundation" is a floor, a bottom - the baseline on the measure tape. If I understand your words correctly, you mean to say that there is such a foundation and that anything beyond it is undesirable because of self-absolution of responsibility and the degradation of the self that follows. Do I understand your words correctly? Correct me if I don't: you provide a perspective I've never encountered before.

user-inactivated  ·  2946 days ago  ·  link  ·  
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user-inactivated  ·  2945 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Thank you for elaborating on that.

For you, what would make for true acceptance of things in relationships, as opposed to merely escaping responsibility?

user-inactivated  ·  2945 days ago  ·  link  ·  
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user-inactivated  ·  2945 days ago  ·  link  ·  

It does. Thank you. I wish it could be less vague, but, as you've said, every person is different.

I hope it's okay if I ask you one more thing. If a person says they like spending time with you but, for whatever reason, can never seem to find the time unless you put effort into making it (say, by visiting them at home or at work), what does that say about the person and about the relationship?

user-inactivated  ·  2945 days ago  ·  link  ·  
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user-inactivated  ·  2945 days ago  ·  link  ·  

Perhaps it was unwise of me to bring up the question without a proper context, since it impedes your ability to provide insight.

Either way, I appreciate the advice. It's been good to learn things from a more healthy perspective, since mine is quite a bit skewed still.