Trust is not earned. Trust is granted. Much like investment, never trust people you cannot afford to trust. Relationships are all about getting hurt. That's the point. If you do not allow yourself pain then your perception of pleasure will be skewed. So what if they turn out to be "douchebags and assholes." I've got great stories associated with hanging out with "douchebags and assholes." Ask for a "Fuckin' Rob" story some time.
I've got a few on Reddit I can't find immediately. Here's a taste.
This. Douchebags and assholes and ignornant fucktards and all those people that you don't really want to be around are probably some of the most entertaining and the most enlightening individuals. I have more than my fair share of stories about these people. As long as you don't let their douchebaggery affect you (rubbing off on you, making you miserable, etc) they can teach you a lot about yourself and the world and also provide for some crazy awesome nights. In NYC I worked as an assistant editor for some piece of shit mocumentary with the biggest asshole in the world. He had nothing to say that was positive or nice to say about anything. He was generally condescending to females, as well as short guys, minorities, rich folk, and professors. It was miserable to be in the steamy suite with him even though the editing process was relatively smooth. There were no workflow issues or "oops we forgot to shoot half of a scene what do we do." Still it was miserable. But I learned more about editing from him than anyone else, got a great drug dealer from the experience, and also learned how to deal with and stay positive on set and in the suite, even when you are confronted with miserable situations. Later that year I was on my student set - a little stick out bridge thing in east Manhattan - in January. It was raining, sleeting, gusty, we had a 4 person crew carrying around our 50lb camera equip and wardrobe changes. It was a near-death experience. But all I could think about is how horrible I felt when I was stuck in that editors suite with mr. miserable douchebag. So I picked my head up and stayed so motherfucking positive it became silly. The rest of the crew followed. The final product turned out great and the crew all became way closer after the managing to survive the harrowing endeavor. Honestly, if I hadn't been stuck with mr. miserable I probably would've been griping my way through the 12 hour day, which would have made it so much worse. If anyone's interested, here's the final product. It's a happy little tale, shot over two days in 18 different locations. https://vimeo.com/10734505So what if they turn out to be "douchebags and assholes." I've got great stories associated with hanging out with "douchebags and assholes."
Fuckin' assholes teach you a lot. And honestly, if I'm becoming too affected by an asshole, I just try and remind myself that they will either learn that they're being shitty, or they will die lonely. So either their behavior will change eventually, or they will receive their just desserts. And then I don't really mind being affected, because it's generally temporary. But great story