I don't know If it qualifies as an unexpected moment, but in June I tried to enter in a French business school and I had to take a competitive exam. We were around 1500 students to take the exam which included 2 stages (1. A long essay on a specific topic and a test which is like the GMAT ; 2. Oral exam and an English oral test). At the end, I didn't pass. I was close, one point close. It hurts and it will probably change the course of my life career wise for the better or the worst.
I was in a 5 year long relationship prior to meeting my wife. I used to wonder about what my life might have been like if we didn't break up etc. Then after my wife and I had children that all ended. There are seemingly infinite directions our lives could go in. That can be disconcerting to some, but to me I find it extremely exciting and even encouraging. Good luck with it and thanks for sharing!It hurts and it will probably change the course of my life career wise for the better or the worst.
I'm sorry to hear about your disappointment. The strange thing about life is that you never get to see the alternate paths, you know?
I'm starting to realize that more and more but I'm having a hard time not asking myself those "What if" questions. In some areas of my life (day to day activities), it seems to me that I have no problem of "letting go of things", but when it concerns big life event, like the choice of my university degree, even if I rationalized my choice before starting university, I'm still asking myself three years later what If I had chosen engineering or philosophy or ... ? Life opens up such a variety of opportunity that I kind of feel tricked by choosing one over the other. "There are seemingly infinite directions our lives could go in. That can be disconcerting to some, but to me I find it extremely exciting and even encouraging." That's indeed exciting, but it increases complexity. In one week, I'm going to enter my fourth year of college (in France, university is divided in two parts : the first three years are generally focusing on general topics like economics, management, philosophy, history, etc. and the fourth and last year are more focused) and I will have to decide at the end of the year in what I will be working for a huge part of my life. Marketing, logistics, finance, accounting, consulting, entrepreneurship are such diverse topics that I still don't know which one I'm going to choose. I don't have a "one beats all", I find multiple topics interesting and I think I will be able to have a happy life whether I chose one or the other. Thinking about it, I thought : well, I should chose something that opens up opportunities where I could have a meaningful life, then I thought, what is a meaningful life ? I then remembered this letter by Richard Feynman : http://genius.cat-v.org/richard-feynman/writtings/letters/problems ""The worthwhile problems are the ones you can really solve or help solve, the ones you can really contribute something to." and it's just an infinite loop in my head. I bought How Will You Measure Your Life ? by Clayton M. Christensen 5 days ago, it might offer me some answer. Thanks.
Edit: That Feynman letter is wonderful. I'm reprinting it here for others to see in hopes that it helps them as it did you. I was very happy to hear from you, and that you have such a position in the
Research Laboratories. Unfortunately your letter made me unhappy for you seem
to be truly sad. It seems that the influence of your teacher has been to give
you a false idea of what are worthwhile problems. The worthwhile problems are
the ones you can really solve or help solve, the ones you can really contribute
something to. A problem is grand in science if it lies before us unsolved and
we see some way for us to make some headway into it. I would advise you to take
even simpler, or as you say, humbler, problems until you find some you can
really solve easily, no matter how trivial. You will get the pleasure of
success, and of helping your fellow man, even if it is only to answer a
question in the mind of a colleague less able than you. You must not take away
from yourself these pleasures because you have some erroneous idea of what is
worthwhile. You met me at the peak of my career when I seemed to you to be concerned with
problems close to the gods. But at the same time I had another Ph.D. Student
(Albert Hibbs) was on how it is that the winds build up waves blowing over
water in the sea. I accepted him as a student because he came to me with the
problem he wanted to solve. With you I made a mistake, I gave you the problem
instead of letting you find your own; and left you with a wrong idea of what is
interesting or pleasant or important to work on (namely those problems you see
you may do something about). I am sorry, excuse me. I hope by this letter to
correct it a little. I have worked on innumerable problems that you would call humble, but which I
enjoyed and felt very good about because I sometimes could partially succeed.
For example, experiments on the coefficient of friction on highly polished
surfaces, to try to learn something about how friction worked (failure). Or,
how elastic properties of crystals depends on the forces between the atoms in
them, or how to make electroplated metal stick to plastic objects (like radio
knobs). Or, how neutrons diffuse out of Uranium. Or, the reflection of
electromagnetic waves from films coating glass. The development of shock waves
in explosions. The design of a neutron counter. Why some elements capture
electrons from the L-orbits, but not the K-orbits. General theory of how to
fold paper to make a certain type of child’s toy (called flexagons). The energy
levels in the light nuclei. The theory of turbulence (I have spent several
years on it without success). Plus all the “grander” problems of quantum
theory. No problem is too small or too trivial if we can really do something about it. You say you are a nameless man. You are not to your wife and to your child. You
will not long remain so to your immediate colleagues if you can answer their
simple questions when they come into your office. You are not nameless to me.
Do not remain nameless to yourself – it is too sad a way to be. now your place
in the world and evaluate yourself fairly, not in terms of your naïve ideals of
your own youth, nor in terms of what you erroneously imagine your teacher’s
ideals are. Best of luck and happiness. Sincerely, Richard P. Feynman.Life opens up such a variety of opportunity that I kind of feel tricked by choosing one over the other.
That is what is referred to as opportunity cost and it is something that haunts me too. For example, I often choose to be on Hubski when I could be recording music or recording music when I could be reading or reading when I could be watching a movie or watching a movie when I could be writing or writing when I could be painting or painting when I could be on Hubski. It's a viscous cycle. -Really, they're all pretty awesome endeavors. I guess in a lot of regards it's not what you do, but how you do it.Dear Koichi,
I'm going to continue studying at university (The Sorbonne). In France, there are two ways that opens up after high school if you want to end with a 5 year degree : University, which is almost free (I pay something like 500 euros for one year, including insurance, sports, courses) but it has 2 major flaws : the network is almost non-existent, thus you have a more difficult time finding a job and the career development is slower. The Prépa (2 years) which is like a follow up of High school but it's difficult and requires a lot of dedication/hard work. After the Prepa, you generally enter a school (the better your grades at the competitive exam, the better the school) for 3 years. The school can cost a lot (around 10k euros/year, it can be around 15k/year for the bests), but it's an investment. The network is really huge and you will be able to have a career development faster than in university. You can enter some of these schools by taking an other competitive exam rather than the one done by those who chosed the prépa, where you do 3 years at university and 2 years at the school. I tried this way but it didn't work out this year. I might try again next year even if I "lose" 1 year.
HEC is the best business school in France, but I didn't thought I had a chance. I tried EM Lyon, which is the fourth best.