- ...I’m sorry that I detracted from your event. Do you really think people who were going to go to the talk changed their mind because of my email? I don’t think so, and that was not my aim at all - I wanted to give those people who had been looking forward to playing soccer on Thursday a chance to do that.
You do not get to define who I am. Fuck off. Clearly you only see me at face value and yes I’m white and male, what do you want me to do about that? I have a second family that I have spent a good portion of my life with. My brothers Paco Rafa and Diego my mom Julie my grandmother Margo and my father Arnoldo. Technically their my god-family but for all intensive purposes they are my family, call me their 4th son, and I am extremely close with them. My father came from Costa Rica as a fourteen year old boy, living, working and studying through an education program jointly coordinated by the catholic church and UC Berkeley. My 2nd family is Costa Rican, and I am a part of that family no matter what you say. I’m not claiming to be latino and I don’t think I’ve ever claimed that, but I do have a latino family and you trying to separate me from them, to create distance that doesn’t exist based purely on how you incorrectly perceive me, is terribly offensive.
I have to assume that these dudes have some history, and that this is taken out of context. There's no way that anyone could get that pissy about something like this, I hope. If so, a rough life awaits beyond college, son. You're a spicy Latino; are you offended by use of the term futbol? I've always respected the English language for its adaptability and mutability. It is good to know, based on this exchange, that white Americans and Latin Americans can both butcher English with equal disregard.
This better describes my use of the tag #somepeopleskids. I recall working at Gratzi restaurant in Ann Arbor. I was a manager on a very busy friday night. An asian man, with a family of 6 and no reservation wanted a table. It was 7:30 on a FRIDAY. I let him know that it would be roughly 45 minutes. He was fine with that. 30 minutes later I had a table for him. It was a table further back in the restaurant, near the kitchen. It was a large booth that comfortably can seat 6 people. He took me aside and said: Guest: "just because we are asian doesn't mean you can seat me next to the kitchen." Me: I sat you at the first available table that could accommodate 6 people Guest: I saw you seat another 6 people before me at the front of the restaurant. They arrived after we did. Me: Yes, they have a reservation. Guest: I think it's because we are asian Me: Look, racism is a very real thing and this isn't it and frankly, I don't appreciate you ascribing such motives to me. You can have this table or you can wait for another table, but the larger tables near the front of the restaurant have been reserved for people that called well in advance to plan their evening out. Guest: We'll take this table You had to be there to see it, but it was pretty evident that this guy knew how to get a better table and that this had worked for him before. THAT SAID, I have no doubt that at some restaurants, there are asshole managers that will seat minorities in less visible sections. This is disgusting. Anyways, I only bring this up because of your a "rough life awaits" made me think of this guy.
My other reply is also about this, but if there's not a backstory here I think an out of the blue outrage could come from how this conversation is "traded" online. This is a new idea for me, so bear with me as I'm hammering out the details and the language. There are a lot of frank conversations online about race. These conversations are largely anonymous so people can spout controversial or offensive positions very easily. These conversations are also at will so people can walk away if things don't go their way, leading to a huge number of very heated but unresolved conflicts. These conversations are all carried out by flesh and blood human beings, none of whom can completely detach themselves emotionally from the content. This creates the ideal conditions to breed the strongest, negative, emotional links to the most controversial and incendiary topics. Once these links are in place, it can be very difficult for an individual to to be confronted with the topic to separate the emotional response built in other conversations from the future discussion about to take place. That's the idea, I've been trying to work out any way. But in this case I think something happened at the last pick up game: These are so specific that it seems like he's been stewing on them for a while....you take up space, steal the ball, don’t pass,...
...non passing the ball, stealing the ball from beginners,...
...non passing the ball, stealing the ball from beginners,... -I completely agree. It sounds like these two have issues between each other that stem beyond the topic/forum used to unearth them....you take up space, steal the ball, don’t pass,...
These are so specific that it seems like he's been stewing on them for a while.
I'm thinking more and more about the information economy instead of the social culture because I feel like this kind of article is dictated more by the former. The pervasive capital of the current information economy is anger. Anger capital has enough power to get people excited, and excited people like, share, and comment on posts. Excited people, whether they are for or against the subject at hand, spread the information like wildfire. This anger trade is great for spreading information, but it has the negative effect of adding a toxic tinge to the topic. When the same information is brought up in other contexts, say a face to face conversation with a new person, someone who's only ever traded this information in anger won't be able to disassociate the topic from that feeling and could end up finishing an angry conversation that the other person didn't know they started. I think a lot of these articles are sculpted to produce ire in every instance and as a result, we attach that ire to the conversation at hand. This does help to create a conversation, but that conversation is so negative, that it rarely ever moves us towards reconciliation. Sorry, this is a bit of a tangent, I've got other things on the mind and this just brought them to the surface.
Are more white people going to think twice before sprinkling in some Spanish next time they talk to a brown person? If yes, then this guy’s response was effective. The frame I would use is not (lame-ass whiny) victim versus dignified person as this article’s author would like to do. It is effective versus ineffective. If complaining that my boss gave me my first negative feedback the very day I announced my pregnancy gets me fired, that is ineffective toward my goal of me (and other women) continuing a career in tech. If it results in him not doing it to the next gal, it’s a win. It’s impossible to predict what will happen, so I’ve kept my mouth shut. I don’t think keeping my mouth shut is “dignified.” I think it can be read as craven.
I'm from Texas. Spanish is part of Texan culture, so even though I'm a white guy, there are Spanish words and phrases sprinkled throughout my vocabulary. That's how I grew up. What's so bad about that?Are more white people going to think twice before sprinkling in some Spanish next time they talk to a brown person? If yes, then this guy’s response was effective. The frame I would use is not (lame-ass whiny) victim versus dignified person as this article’s author would like to do. It is effective versus ineffective.
Nothing. Nothing is bad about that. The beautiful thing about language is that nobody owns it. You could walk around using 1/4 french, english, spanish and swahili and there would be nothing wrong with it. -My hat would be off to you for being so lingual! I'm 1/2 mexican, does that mean I get to use half spanish words when speaking? It's all absurd. I think people both positively and negatively ascribe too much identity with race/ethnicity. I'm proud to be ____ -with the blank being filled with southern, eastern, northern, western, brown, black, white, christian, muslim, buddhist, female, male, tv/ts, tall, short, american.... whatever. Just be proud of YOU, if you're someone worth being proud of. It's your efforts in life that ascribe meaning to you, not these other things, imo. Anyways, yeah... you don't need a certain level of pigment or need to be from a hispanic cultural background in order to employ spanish words in your speech. Está todo bien!
While I understand the whole idea of victimhood culture I'm not sure that the example they presented was a good one. I mean I couldn't hope to count the number of times I've gotten off-hand remarks about being Hispanic. I just brush them off, but I honestly can't see this dude blowing up like that if this was literally the first instance of this issue. Even if this was the first issue, it may not have been the first instance in his current environment. If it is the dude is being oversensitive, and blew it way out of proportion.
Yeah, what people don't understand about what are termed "microagressions" is that they are constant. The example here is so minute that it just looks ridiculous to people, but imagine getting these comments every day, or even several times a day. It gets pretty damn tiring after a while. But the kid's reaction is just insane. Trying to publicly shame the other party instead of just privately telling them why you feel offended? Kid's got issues...
I was also thinking about the place in which he posted it. I'm at work, but it was a school website with the explicit goal of bring things like that to light. That sort of brings into question whether this school has a problem with this already that warrants a website like that.
http://obiemicroaggressions.tumblr.com/ A much longer version of the letter is on the site. The white guy seems to be confused by the situation and hammering out a lot of identity problems. It's a fascinating read, mostly because I can identify with his confusion and self aware lack of understanding.
Or does the existence of a prominent outlet like that create more situations like this, which would otherwise be resolved in private? I find it incredibly rude that the 'aggrieved' student's first course of action was to publicly shame and condemn their fellow classmate in front of the world, instead of privately expressing their concerns. They certainly do not look better for it.
oh yay another article about how weak and whiny college students are~ Do we wait before or after the horse turns to glue when we start desigining the packaging? Regardless of the intent of the article, the comments that show up afterwards can give you an idea of the filth it helps propagate But it's cool this one example will be really helpful when people tweet it at me 100 times the next time I make a complaint about bullshit I have to deal with lol
I really like the definition of honor vs dignity cultures. I had that problem at my last job. People were jealous of me, and would pick on me. I didn't do anything, but tell my coordinator at the department of rehabilitation. I am going to make that a priority in the future, to work for places with dignity culture. I don't know what I expected, from a place that only plays country music, and puts felons in charge.
I was going to begin using that tag for posts regarding youth culture. I'm old.
oof.Technically their my god-family but for all intensive purposes...
What's wrong with that sentence? I have a family that is "technically my god-family" too and that's exactly how I would write it, for all intents and purposes, they're family. Tell me how that description prompts an "oof?"
Both the white dude and Latina chick come off as whiny, oversensitive assholes.